Thursday, July 21, 2011

Love to Hate Myself...

Why do girls love to hate themselves??

I mean seriously. We focus more on the negative than the positive. Its hard to not look in the mirror and see something we dont like. How often do you just stand in front of the mirror being sad. Whether your staring at your nose that you hate, or your eyes that are too far apart or too close. Your boobs that are too small. That fat roll that just wont go away. Those thunder thighs. That cellulite. The droopy "mom bum", or whatever your flaw/flaws might be. I am AMAZED at some of the crazy things girls can come up with.


I guess i am blogging about this because i have been having a really hard time with this the last few weeks. Its frustrating when your working so hard to get fit and not be getting ANYWHERE due to your thyroid. Ya know and its not just that i "want to be skinny". I dont want to be skinny. I want to be healthy.

2 years now and ive tried EVERYTHING. I explain this in my weight loss tab under my header but after high school and getting married, i gained 20 pounds. Got pregnant, had high blood pressure, gained another 60 pounds. THATS 80 POUNDS PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!! I lost 30 right off the bat from water weight. I did the HCG diet a year ago, and lost another 20. Well here i am, a year later, still 30 pounds over weight. I havent' lost anything sense then. Ive dont Jillian Micheals 30 day shred, do her yoga and no more trouble zone workouts. Did alot of cycling. Did the clean eating for a while. Did Chalene Johnsons turbo jam workouts. Did the entire INSANITY 60 day workouts. I watch what i eat and eat healthy. And NOTHING is working. Do you know how frustrating and depressing that is??

Ive struggled with eating disorders in high school but i REFUSE to go to that level. IM BETTER THAN THAT. IM STRONGER THAN THAT. And i think thats what's so frustrating. Im NOT giving up. Im not being lazy. Im not taking the "easy" route. (not that starving yourself is easy). Im staying strong and working my A** OFF!

Im just finally at the point where i cant fight off the depression. I cant hold myself high anymore. Im slowly giving up. Im counting down the days to my next endocrinologist appt. One more week. I literally want to crawl up in a ball and just wait for wednesday to get here.

I just hate feeling like this. Normally i am so positive. I like to set the example. Set the bar high. Be someone that people can look up to. Be an inspiration for. And i feel like im slowly loosing that. And i hate it.

Lets get back to happy town!

Sorry about all the negative talk. Like i said im just at that breaking point. So girls, this coming week, lets set a goal. We are going to look at all the POSITIVES about ourselves. We need to set the bar high and be examples. ESPECIALLY if we have kids, even more important, daughters. We need to break the cycle and teach girls to appreciate ourselves and KNOW that we are BEAUTIFUL.

I need some positive vibes. So here is the plan, lets start this week by making a post of EVERYTHING we love about ourselves. And i want to read them. So im gonna do a link up and im going to read each and every one. Ive never done a linky before so lets hope it works lol. Let me know if it isnt working

If you'd like you can copy this code
young and restless


Amber said...

I found that not limiting myself from anything made me happier, and I also noticed after awhile I didn't even want ''junk'' food anymore. I struggled losing my baby weight, took me close to three years, and then I got pregnant with my second and had to start over. I started doing things that didn't feel like working out like ballet, yoga, and horse riding. The best thing to remember is that if you were your ideal weight at one point then it is possible to be there again, and that with age it does take a little longer though.

KimBerly said...

I've been living with depression since I was a little girl. I am not afraid to admit that I have been on meds since I was a teen. My 20's were very hard for me. Now that I am in my 30's I feel I have a good handle on my depression. I mean I still have my days but nothing like it used to be.
I've also struggled with my weight. I recently lost 30 pounds but it wasn't easy. I know how you feel. We are all way too hard on ourselves. I still have a hard time letting people take my pictures. I don't know if this is too personal but have you considered anti depressants? Some people don't believe in them but I am all for what ever makes you feel better. I take them and I know they help.

I want to participate in your challenge but I have the hardest time saying things positive about myself as well. I will try though. When are you starting this challenge? What are the details of this challenge?
Keep your head up sweetie. I am sending positive vibes your way.

oomph. said...

i think we've all been to that breaking point where we are just so overwhelmed by...something. try not to focus on "losing 30 lbs"...rather set a weekly, attainable goal like working out three times, or not eating out that week...and DO reward yourself at the end of the week with something that you love. chin up, girl, you're fabulous! and, you have a huge family of support out here!


Melanie said...

First off, you are absolutley beautiful! Not just cute, not just saying this to say it... Gorgeous! I thought it the first time I saw your pretty face. & uhmmm... where the heck is the wait you still want to loose...?

I feel such a kinship w/ you. I too have major thyroid ish. A severely underactive thyroid, but thankfully medication has worked a bit. I've lost 20lbs, but have a bunch more to go. I am so joining your link!

I have crazy monkey-man named Jax trying to close my laptop. lol. We will for surely talk later. Big hug...!

kyna... said...

{big hugs} to you!

♡ Kyna

cmyoung said...

We've all been there. You ARE beautiful so keep your head up. I'm a new follower and would love for you to follow back :)

Style Journey said...

This post is really great. As women we do get down on ourselves for not being "perfect" I think you are beautiful after reading through your blog and your children are beautiful. I am glad you made the decision to focus on your positives and be happy and healthy! Things always get better. And I try to use the motto "There is always someone worse off than me", so when I am feeling down, I try to think of that motto :)

Eliza said...

This post was beautiful. I'm so sorry you're having a hard time but I love what you're doing about it.I've been feeling sooo down about myself lately so we have that in common.

p.s. I'm following back. Thanks for stopping by!

Christa said...

thanks guys you are all so sweet :)

Brandi said...

Thank you for that sweet comment you posted! and thank you for creating such and inspiring post! You too are very beautiful! I love your blog, im so glad I discoverd it!

thinkpriddy said...

Thank you for the kind comment and thank you for inviting me to join this link up! You are beautiful and I love that you want to change the cycle for other women and young girls. Keep up the good work!


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